My Baby is Saving My Life

On December 18th, 2015,  My husband and I found out we were having a baby. It was one of the most exciting days in our lives- so much so I took five tests. My husband was at work that day, so I had to find a cute way to tell him. I baked a cake and decked it out in pink and blue with the words "We're Preggo!" He saw it, we hugged and cried happy tears and started to dream about the changes and happiness this new life would bring.

I quickly scheduled all of my prenatal appointments and anxiously waited to start seeing a cute little baby bump. Unfortunately, the scale kept creeping up, but no bump was to be seen! Finally around week 16, little baby started to make its appearance in my belly.

A few years ago I was alerted that I had a bicornuate uterus or heart shaped uterus, which means there is a separation in the middle of the uterus. Upon my first appointment with my doctor, I let her know this was the case and she assured me it would be looked after carefully. She decided to send me to a high-risk doctor for one appointment, just to get some another opinion on how the pregnancy might present itself.

At that visit, the doctor checked all of my records thoroughly, asked a bunch of questions and let me know of the possible implications of my uterus and how the baby was placed. I left reassured that the baby was safe and had my anatomy scan a few days later.

At 21 weeks, on April 4th, 2016 I had my anatomy scan. At this scan, the baby is measured in detail- we found out we were having a baby girl! I met with the doctor, she let me know that the high-risk doctor wanted to see some blood work, so I went and got that taken care of. My husband and I went home, cried happy tears, went and bought some cute girl clothes, and told all of our friends and family.

The next day I received a call from the high-risk doctor I had seen a few days prior. He let me know that something in my blood was coming back abnormal, and asked a bunch of questions to try to get to the bottom of it. He gave me his phone number in case I had any questions and I went along my merry way. A few hours later I received another call. This time, it was the high-risk doctor again, and they wanted to me go to the hospital for further testing to see what the abnormality might be. I cried, and my husband and I went to the hospital.

I got to the hospital the day after I found out I was having a baby girl. I was admitted to the OB Unit, hooked up on an IV and began getting checked every few hours. It was strange since I hadn't felt any different or felt like anything was wrong. They began taking blood, about three separate times. I still didn't think anything of it considering I felt good. I sat in bed, relaxed, watched some "Fixer-Upper" and went to sleep.

I woke up the next day and met with the hematology department. Two doctors came into the room and reported to me that abnormal white blood cells were showing up in my blood work. They were pretty clear that these types of cells were very abnormal and something to be concerned about. They told me these cells were usually seen in Leukemia, a blood cancer. I immediately began to cry and almost threw up. They ordered a bone marrow biopsy, and that was completed a few hours later.

The bone marrow biopsy was not as bad as I thought it'd be, but it was not a walk in the park. My husband was so great, holding my hand throughout. The doctors numbed my hip bone near my back and scraped pieces of my bone along with some marrow. Afterwards, my back was very sore and it was difficult to walk. It felt like the muscle pain after getting a shot in your arm, but much worse!

After a few more hours in the hospital following the bone marrow biopsy, the doctors discharged me, as they were not giving me any treatment. They told me I would get the results in two days.

Those were the longest two days of my life.

I told my family, a few friends and started to think again how my life, my husbands life, and my baby's life would change. I'd like to say I thought positive, but I was more realistic and kind of had a bad feeling.

Two days later, on April 8th, 2016, I went to the cancer center to get the results of my test. I've never had test results before, I'd always imagined you go in a room and they deliver the news. This was a little different. I checked in, and they wanted to take more blood. I went in to the triage room and the nurse started asking my name and date of birth, all with a needle in her hand. I started crying- I was so confused that they were taking blood. I thought they were just telling me some results. She assured me it was just to check and it was fine.

A few minutes passed, which felt like a lifetime. I was greeted by my two hematology doctors that had came and talked to me in the hospital two days prior. They delivered the news:

"I'm sorry but, you have Acute Myeloid Leukemia" 

I cried, asked questions and cried some more.

The doctors explained what will be happening in the next few months and assured me that the baby as well as myself will be taken care of as best as possible.

My husband and I went home and told our family. It was emotional, it sucked, but I was somehow finally finding peace, well as much as one could be. The two days of waiting for results was grueling. I feel like I had somewhat prepared myself for the worst, and wanted to be as strong as I could for my family who was hurting.

Its difficult to explain how it feels. I do not feel pitty, or why me. I'm sad, and I think that's to be expected. But overall, there's this feeling like everything good is being taken away. I love being pregnant, I've felt great, but now it feels like my joy of pregnancy is being ripped away. I have faith in my doctors and know they are going to do everything they can to help get me and keep baby girl healthy.

I can't help but think, my baby is saving my life.