Happy Birthday!

We have a beautiful baby! Well, part one of our journey is complete, Ryan and I have managed to safely bring another life into this crazy world and we couldn’t be happier.

As mentioned in my previous post, things strayed away from the plan. I went to my last few appointments on Thursday and got a bunch of news. I was scheduled first for a bone marrow transplant consultation, which went really well. Ryan and I spent two hours talking with the doctor and it looks like its full steam ahead with planning for a stem cell or bone marrow (same thing) transplant after my next round of chemo. It turned out that one of my brothers is a half match, and he has generously agreed to donate his stem cells. The doctor explained that since they were unable to find a perfect match in the bone marrow registry, the related half match might work just as well. This process should start in late August/early September and will come with a 6-12 month recovery. Essentially, they are wiping out all of my cells in my current immune system, and are going to replace them with my brother’s immune system, pretty cool. There are many risks associated with this procedure such as infection and graft vs. host disease, where your body rejects the cells. I’m incredibly nervous for this part- people die from this, but it’s the best option in my case to hopefully be cured. As for now, I’m scheduled to go back to the hospital for another month starting July 5^th for my second round of chemo.

After that appointment I was scheduled to go get the second steroid shot before delivery. My OB was waiting for me and starting taking vitals right away. It turned out that my blood pressure was on the higher side of normal and I had a headache for the entire morning. She was worried about preeclampsia and recommended that I go to triage for monitoring to see if it would go down. On the walk over to the hospital, my blood work was processed from the previous bone marrow appointment (blood is drawn and levels are checked at every appointment) and it turned out that my platelets had dropped significantly from the previous week. I just started crying. It was, and I guess still is a possibility that the leukemia could be back already, but it could also just be from the pregnancy. Anyway, my OB talked with my oncologist and they decided that delivering the next day was the best option.

I was admitted to the hospital that afternoon and enjoyed my last few hours of being pregnant. I was sad knowing that Emma wasn’t ready to come into the world yet- she was doing flips, had hiccups and was kicking me like crazy- I could tell she was happy. The next day I was put on magnesium through an IV at 9am. The magnesium is given to people who deliver early to help protect both the mother and baby from complications such as cerebral palsy and seizures. I was scheduled for a c-section at 12pm, but there happened to be several emergencies, so we waited until about 7pm. It was hard to wait, but I’m grateful that my situation wasn’t severe enough to be considered an emergency. I also got another blood transfusion while I waited.

Around 7pm, I was taken back to the operating room alone. I was scared and crying (seems to be a theme here!). I knew Emma was going to be okay, but I didn’t know about myself. I was given the epidural and prepped for the surgery, Ryan came back shortly after. They tested my belly to see if I could feel anything, but all I could feel was a lot of pushing. A few minutes later, Ryan and I heard crying. That was music to my ears and I immediately started crying (again!). Prior to delivery, I was told that if the baby was okay, we might get a peek, but we didn’t get a peek. I was very nervous that something was wrong, but it turned out that the room was very cold and they needed to get her to the NICU immediately to keep her warm. The anesthesiologist went to take a picture of her to reassure us. They stitched me up and I went to the recovery room. I waited for the epidural to wear off and Ryan went to see Emma. He came back with pictures, and I couldn’t wait to see her.

After a few hours, I was finally able to see her. They wheeled my bed into the tiny transitional NICU and let me hold her. The feeling was incredible. I just cried (!). It’s amazing to me how much we have been through together. She has already taught me so much- most importantly, love and how to be strong. We spent about 10 minutes together, then I went to my room and she went back to the NICU. Ryan was able to go see her a few times, which I thought was really important.

Since being born, Emma has been doing amazing. She was originally on a CPAP machine to push air into her lungs, but she has already graduated from it. She has a feeding tube directly to her stomach and has been tolerating her feedings for the last few days. She is up to 10ml each feeding. I have been cleared to pump milk for her, which has been going pretty well. She has a lot of wires and IVs, which help monitor her heart and breathing. She’s very active, she loves to kick and move all over her incubator. I think she also knows her mommy and daddy now. She opens her eyes when we’re there and is so content when we talk to her and hold her. We love talking to her and singing songs and just being there. It’s amazing how we can spend hours in the hospital with her and it feels like minutes. We have been able to get over to the hospital everyday since discharge. The nurses have been great about letting us hold her, I’m also able to call the NICU at any time and the nurse always gives me a full report.

Overall life is pretty good right now. I always kind of feel like I have this doom over my head, but I’m trying my best to focus on the things that are going right. I’m so lucky to have a beautiful baby girl to hold in my arms and I’m going to focus and enjoy this time while I have it.

**One last reminder! The community blood drive is on June 30, 2016 at the East Islip Fire Department. New York City is in a blood emergency, please consider donating! We will also be testing people who wish to be put on the bone marrow donor registry! You can help save someone’s life!  

Emma Grace, June 17th 2016 3lbs 11oz

My first time meeting Emma

Baby Shower!

Hi! I apologize for taking so long to write another post, things have been hectic (in a good way)! Since getting home, a little over two weeks ago, things have been gradually getting better. The first week home was difficult. I was feeling very weak and a bit down, but luckily it only lasted a few days. Coming home was much more difficult than I had imagined. I thought once I was home, I would somewhat jump back into my daily routine, but that wasn't the case. I needed to sleep a lot, needed help just walking around, and I had to stay home until I went to the doctor because I didn't know where my blood counts were. It was heartbreaking to feel so helpless in my own environment and at times it felt like it wasn't going to get better.

After going to the doctor, a few days after being discharged, I got good news! I had a bone marrow biopsy and it confirmed that I had reached remission! :) The whole point of the first round of treatment, Induction Chemotherapy, is to induce a remission. All of the treatments afterwards are meant to maintain the remission. It was so exciting to know that all of the time in the hospital paid off. This helped to perk my mood, and I started feeling better within the week.

After that appointment, I had another with my OB. We set up a date for delivery! As of now I am scheduled for a c-section, but if the baby turns I will be induced. The plan all along has been to deliver Emma at 32 weeks, which would be the week of June 20th.  I know this sounds crazy, but while I was in the hospital, I got really freaked out that the star signs for that week turned to Cancer! What are the chances of getting cancer while pregnant, having to deliver two months early, AND having the baby's star sign be a cancer?! It was too much for me! I told my doctor and she apparently didn't think I was too crazy because she went along with my idea of choosing a delivery date for a Gemini (they were close anyway). Ryan and I were able to choose between three days, one of them being a Sunday, which I thought would be a nice day. I had no idea until I put it on my calendar, but its Father's Day! I am so excited that Ryan gets to have his daughter on Father's Day, how special!

After my doctors appointments, it was time to get ready for something I had been looking forward to for awhile, my baby shower! After all of the craziness surrounding chemo, it was difficult to focus on the pregnancy. I was so excited to get back into baby mode and celebrate her soon arrival. My mom, with the help of my friend Dawn and family, set up a beautiful baby shower for little Emma. Everything was amazing from the food, decorations and company. It was so nice to see my friends and family who I haven't seen in so long. I'm so thankful for everyone taking the time out to come celebrate Emma and for giving us such generous gifts. She is certainly one spoiled baby already! We only had a week between the shower and Emma's arrival and while she won't be home for awhile, I wanted everything set up and ready to go for her. We only had a week between the shower and her arrival, so the wonderful daddy-to-be, Ryan, has been busy every night setting up all of her stuff.

This week is filled with a ton of doctor's appointments. Today and tomorrow I will be going into the city to get a steroid shot. Since Emma is coming early, a steroid shot can be given a few days before birth to help develop her lungs. I will be getting the first shot today, and need to go back for the second in 24 hours. I will meet with my OB tomorrow for a final check up, be admitted on Saturday night and have Emma on Sunday! Within these appointments I will also be getting my blood checked and meet with a Bone Marrow Transplant doctor to discuss the best options for continuing treatment. As of now, I have a two week recovery time after the c-section and will be back in the hospital for round two of chemo. This round will be another month in the hospital and will begin after the 4th of July.

The last exciting thing I'd like to address is the blood drive! While I was in the hospital, and for all of my future hospital stays, I relied on many blood and platelet transfusions. To help give back, my family has arranged a blood drive in my honor. It will be on June 30th at the East Islip Fire Department. I will attach the flier below.  If you are unavailable but still wish to donate, consider making an appointment at your nearest blood center! It is so important for people to have access to the blood they need!

As always, thank your for all of the love and support. The next time I update this blog, Ryan and I will be parents! :) :) :)

Kristin